Spiritual Guidance
A Blog Series By:
Reiki Reverend, Ph.D.
I’ll be giving in-depth yet light-hearted spiritual guidance, spiritual counseling, and a way for you to enhance your spiritual awakening.
In this article, we’ll be taking a step back. What do I mean? Read my story below.
Taking One Step Back
My goal today is the provide the help you need to achieve that next step on your personal paths to your higher purpose. Speaking of steps, that’s exactly what I want to talk about.
Steps.
Already, I have some people excited about that concept. “Alright, progress, moving forward all the time.”
After all, most of us perceive time as linear even if we don’t think about it consciously. We wake up in the morning expecting the rest of our day to fall in line from beginning to end. Sunrise to sunset, event to event.
That’s a fine way to look at things, but what if I told you that sometimes, things don’t always work out like that. Some people will automatically see where I’m going. I may have just lost everyone else, but that’s ok, isn’t it?
That’s the point.
Your day may have been going along rather smoothly before this point.
Or this point.
Or even this point.
Now you may be starting to question the way things are going to work within this blog.
I assure you that this is all going according to plan. Who’s plan is completely up to your intuition.
I woke up this morning, just like I have the past few days. Only to sit at my desk and wonder what I’m going to do with my day. You see, I’ve had a lot planned out these past days, and I’ve made a lot of changes to how I operate.
These rapid changes in my life seemed to be leading me to what I call, the next season of my epic TV series, that you all just happened to be a part of. I say it like this for a reason. You see, like all popular TV shows, there’s a protagonist or hero, and then there’s the antagonist or villain.
Sometimes, it’s as clear as that guy at the door who’s trying to keep you from entering your favorite restaurant. Other times, it can be far less clear.
A few weeks ago, I was drinking up to a whole pot of coffee a day, I was taking in a lot of nicotine from my e-cigarette, I was stressed, distressed, and just flat out a mess with my emotions. Even though I was thinking these things would help, time after time they just never seemed to work with me completely.
What changed for me you might ask? Reiki.
You see, up until the point of realizing my healing journey, I didn’t have a daily practice or study. I was pretty much just walking by the heels of my shoes, with my feet barely in, and I was waiting for my miracle to happen like a little kid waiting for Santa Claus.
I refused to accept personal accountability for some of the things that went on in my life, even though I was great at deflecting or rewriting a situation in my mind to suit what made me feel better about it.
As a result, my lifestyle seemed to remain in this flux where I secretly knew that things would only improve just long enough for my hope to be shattered before my eyes.
It wasn’t that I was a bad person, I walked in the light and all that comes with that. Every day wasn’t inherently bad for me, but my perception of the day is what would always torture me.
It’s this logic that I was always fighting a constant battle between myself and my inner demons, and the belief that their strength would eventually trump mine is what led me to a victim mentality and caused me to allow for my personal power to be whittled away.
Finally, it all caught up to me.
You see, while I was waiting for this miracle to happen, I wasn’t paying close attention to the abundance and wonder that was accumulating all around me. My son, who was attuned to Reiki while my significant other was pregnant and already developing to be a pretty hefty empath, had begun to understand himself more and more by the day.
My significant other was starting to make some big changes in her life and aiming higher and higher each day. Meanwhile, there I was, a hermit in a cave. I liked my cave for its ‘safety.’ I secretly knew that once I stuck my head out of that cave, it would be time for me to change as well. It would be about time for that next season to come.
I feared that next season so much because it meant that I would be a much larger blip on the radar. I couldn’t make the same childish mistakes of the past without facing some big consequences. I guess you could say that I have a Peter Pan complex, afraid to grow up and come into my own power.
Even then I knew that it would be necessary for me to work at my best and shed as many of my bad habits as I could.
That’s when I was called to begin teaching Reiki again. I knew that I was only at my best when I was practicing on a consistent basis and helping others. It’s like my blood would begin to run cold if I wasn’t helping others.
I had wanted for a long time to try working out a sliding scale to help people out who couldn’t afford the lessons or the sessions, but it was troublesome because I never felt as if I should be charging others.
Not for lack of self-worth, but for lack of desire. I just didn’t feel that Spirit wanted me to get compensation for my services at the time. The less than positive feedback from my associates only made the weight on my shoulders that much heavier.
I remember what happened next like a lucid dream. For the first time in over a month, I had finally lined up a 1-on-1 class with a good friend of mine who I’d been talking to about learning Reiki for about as long as I’d known him. Not even a day later, I had another 1-on-1 class lined up with someone else I was called to teach who I’d known for a while on Facebook.
These classes and the events to follow would come nothing short of fantastic.
That next week I had them both attuned to Reiki I and was proceeding with daily follow-up chats to make sure that they were receiving the attunement well and keeping up with their studies. In that same week, both mine and my significant other’s moms fell ill and ended up in the hospital. Another one of our friends was also making a trip to the hospital for surgery.
As I was called to work more on the infrastructure of my Facebook group I was also coming across a good number of requests for healing.
For the first time, I ran a distance Reiki session for multiple people at the same time. I would then go on to do several other distance sessions over that span of time. I would say that at one point in the week I was doing at least 2-3 a day for about 20-30 minutes at a time.
It would be shortly after that week that I began to feel odd. I had less control over my emotions than normal, and I felt my energy leaking right out of me. My thoughts all seemed to become negative, and before I could even fully process anything that was happening to me I knew I would need to assume the worst.
That for the first time in a long time, all of that negative energy that was being stored up in the corners of my mind had begun to flow freely. It had been revealed to me to help me heal more.
I knew that I had to take action, but I wasn’t confident that I could do it by myself. As I continued to find any source of light inside or outside of me to abate this sensation feeling like it wanted to engulf me, I reached out to whoever I could think of to help me.
Every time I started to reach out, I felt my mind splitting apart at the act, attempting to rip my hands back from the keyboard or phone. It had started to get worse and worse over time. After I had gotten the last message out, I felt in my heart that nobody would reach me in time.
I had to make a choice.
Either let this feeling wash over me and take me, or assume a meditative posture, lock my body up, and fight with every ounce of light I could muster up.
So I turned on my Himalayan salt lamp, put on some appropriate music to meditate to for the occasion, turned it all the way up to drown everything else out, and I went to work chanting the symbols and channeling Reiki in prayer.
I was in deep meditation for about an hour and a half before I would come back to my body. During that period of time, I experienced the greatest crucible I had ever faced.
So many times, I felt my mind and astral body being tossed around, ripped apart, smashed, burned, and much more. It was almost like the dark night of Siddhartha as he meditated under the bodhi tree.
Every set back made it harder and harder for me to will myself back together and continue. I felt like I was fighting a losing battle. That I had too much negativity in me to fight off. This was it, my last crusade. In my final moments of these thoughts, I felt the ascended masters and angels speaking to me.
“Stop fighting with your will, heal with your spirit!”
It was at that moment that I stopped feeling sorry for myself. I stopped thinking of this as a simple battle of brawn and I saw it for what it really was. My grand opportunity to heal myself on the deepest level I could fathom.
I called every ounce of light within me to my hands, every bright and happy moment of my life, every bit of hope and faith in my goals and aspirations, and that night I discovered depths of my capabilities with Reiki.
I channeled it not only into that darkness but to every corner of my mind that was still in pain, every memory that just needed some love and light to grow into something better.
When I came back, I wasn’t anywhere near the same. I felt completely healed on all levels. Over the course of the next few days, I would severely cut down on my caffeine and nicotine consumption, change my diet, and experience a deep reprogramming of my mind and thoughts.
By the end of this time, I would have cut out coffee altogether. I felt a sense of peace and serenity in my mind that seemed to be waiting within for the right moment to come out.
This is a recollection of events during one of my meditations:
“I was journeying to the furthest reaches I could take my astral journey when I first ran across it.
Vibrant streams of energy, huge and dense constructs that felt like other planets super far away, entities that could perform a perfect telepathic connection with such high vibrations (all of them).
We conversed for quite some time before I began to test the limits of my trance with this energy. I was able to move my body in ways I haven’t in years and function at a MUCH higher volume than I’ve ever been capable of.
There were a few odd things that happened though. The more I accepted this developing power within me as mine, the stronger the connection I became between my son and Twin Flame.
I was given the impression that any form of conflict that would occur on this level would not only affect me, but him, her, and even my blood family and ancestors as well. I was even warned quite a few times as the level of the connections slowly escalated to a peak.
The oddest thing that happened to me at that time was a technique called, “Understand.” Several of the entities I encountered used this technique on me. I was able to not only sense their power afterward but peer into ‘them.” Highlights of their existence, where they came from as well as their power and the distant extensions of it.
I would almost always come into a sense of apprehension eventually as if I had a choice to make about whether or not to accept or rebuke the energy. I only rebuked what felt like negative or harmful intent, and simply allowed the rest to be. Then something even odder happened.
After being exposed to this “Understand” technique so many times and allowing myself to exist at my highest potential (mainly to be prepared for anything to go bad), I noticed that I literally had no limits. I could most likely continue to tap my energies for as long as I needed to. Like I was connected to a deep source of unlimited energy.
After a good many times being tried with “Understand,” I began to get how it was being done and I began to exchange this technique with them. It almost seemed like they were trying to teach me after a while. Like they were helping me become more aware of my capabilities, but beware of other entities out there with similar capabilities.
Eventually, I felt it time to ground and come back, but I still feel like I’m a part of it now. Like there are aspects of me that have expanded into a much deeper pool of knowledge and capacity.”
After that, I began to accept and embrace my path in other ways as well. I meditated more and began to expand my consciousness, from the universe that we know to the multiverse that we only dream of.
I have since this time went back and learned more, but that journey is far from over.
This was my step forward.
It took a few weeks, maybe months, but I started to feel drained yet again. This time has been different. I had stopped drinking coffee, but I was slowly gauging up my tea consumption. I’ve felt stuck in a loop and run down. At first, I just thought that I was exerting too much energy during these meditations and that I needed to rest and recharge. After a while, I knew that it was more complicated than that.
Well, the easiest thing I can say is that I finally broke down. I finally made a pot of coffee. The hard part is to say that I needed to take a step back with a lot more than that so that I could move forward later.
At first, I felt a bit down, that I had to depend on something other than my own will to get my engines going. I didn’t see or understand what would come of it because I was too busy worrying about the broken promises, or the step back.
Looking at things now as I write/speak to you, I would say that I needed that step back in order to move forward.
I needed to take another look at myself and my ego and realize that my goals are too important to allow myself to be bogged down by the weight on one step back knowing that with that step back, I am now ready to take a giant leap forward.
This is something we all experience in life at times.
When you admit that you were wrong in an argument to heal from the experience. When you have to wait and pay for your car repairs so that you can finish your vacation or get to work. Even when you must reevaluate everything that you’ve ever thought was right in order to walk the path you’ve always needed to be on.
I’m here to tell you, that not only has it been done before, but it WILL be done again. By you, by your friends, by your family, by your neighbor.
And that’s OK.
Instead of coming from an inner/outer place of judgment when those times finally come, it’s important to have faith in the situation working out for the better.